clarification; good news; Loopy update

Clarification

I really, really appreciated the warm & kind responses (via comments and email) to my previous posts, but I did want to clarify my intent. I didn't say that the rejection I experienced caused me to doubt my worth as a human being, my skill as a teacher, or the likelihood that I will find a job in the future and have a good life henceforth.

All I was trying to convey was the weird uneasiness of having gone through my Plan A, B, C, and D, and grasping at straws to cobble together a Plan E, and having no idea what Plan F was. The musing on "floating" vs "drifting" was just to say that the perception of being "unmoored" as a pleasant or unpleasant experience is entirely created in my own mind, and as such, while not necessarily under my control, it will not harm me if I just ride it out.

Thanks to lots of meditation and therapy I just stayed in that uncertain place, feeling uncomfortable, and whaddya know, it actually resolved itself very quickly.

Good news

So I submitted the application to Operation Fresh Start, as I mentioned, and the more I thought about it the more it seems like a good next step.

(Sidebar: It's not a full-blown classroom situation, and I feel somewhat disappointed not to be able to start practicing my new classroom skills immediately; on the other hand, I'm still in therapy, and while I think I can do a classroom, it might not be so bad to do some more therapy first. I've been trying to learn for the last, uh.... almost twenty years... ever since I decided to major in Japanese instead of biology in college... that I don't have to do the hardest thing.)

ANYWAY. The woman I ran into at Maharaja East also mentioned that her sister-in-law, whom I know from political and social contexts, knows a lot of the long-term staff/organizers at Operation Fresh Start. (This is the advantage of living in a small(er) town!) So I tried to find sister-in-law's email address, but she doesn't do email. Uh-oh!

To my own surprise, I actually brought myself to call her and ask her to put in a good word for me! And she called me back and said she did! And I called her back and thanked her! Wow! It must be all the therapy. Seriously.

THEN, I was worried that the hiring committee wouldn't realize that my temporary license is valid for teaching in Wisconsin. So, I actually brought myself to drive over there and talk with the receptionist, who then brought out the person in charge of the hiring, so I had a chance to do a little mini-interview and tell her how excited I am about the job and tell her some of my ideas for it and so on. She seemed really great, mellow, smart, with-it, etc.

THEN, today they called and gave me an interview! Thursday at 3:15! Wow!!!! I feel so good about it because I really went for it... and it worked out. We'll see what happens but regardless, I feel good that I did everything I could think of.

THEN, yesterday, a big-ish school district close to home (next to the district in which our house sits) emailed me about subbing there... said they had switched to a new computer system and hadn't followed up on the sub applications, but now they're ready to do so and can I come to an orientation tomorrow or next week?

So, you know, it all works out.

Loopy update

So, the last ER trip they gave Loopy prescription-strength Aleve and that seems to be working pretty well (along with the morphine still). But her legs are totally numb, which is scary, and the drugs make her stumble drunkenly and tire easily, which is frustrating for her, and also scary.

On the plus side, the insurance came through and the procedure (the steroid shot) is going to happen on Thursday. (Yes, Thursday is a big day for our household). Fingers crossed it will help! Otherwise they go on to more dramatic steps. :-/

But at least the pain is a lot less and she's getting 6+ hours of sleep at a time. The era of moaning and pacing all night is past, at least for now.

Again, thanks for all your support. We are grateful.