Or does it boil down to this: can a crazy person live with a sane person, without the former getting worse and the latter getting crazy? Just how crazy am I? Is this problem inside my own head? Why can't I be who she needs me to be? Why can't I keep from hurting her? Why can't it be enough - the tremendous love and bounty that I am lucky enough to be blessed with?
What's wrong with me?
Is there something wrong with me? Am I sabotaging something amazing and wonderful, or is there some fundamental flaw that is breaking this apart? Or both?
Those are just rhetorical questions.
My heart is just breaking.
We both want there to be a way through this but we can't see it.
Mirror maze, bramble path, cliffs of fall.
What compass, what north star, what god, what divination can we scrounge out of our scrambled guts?
I keep hoping...
So yeah. Happy anniversary.
1 comment:
Um, ow. *hugs*
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