Some of my favorite memories...

...are referenced on Franklin's blog. But as is always the case with these things, I remember them differently. But for some reason I thought it would be less irritating of me to comment here, rather than on Franklin's blog. Not sure if this is true; do let me know (no, not really).

1) The Gaugin quote--I remember the second phrase as "Ou sommes nous," or "where are we," and hence, I remember Sylvia's dry remark as, "We came from breakfast. We are at the museum. We are going to lunch."

This is one of my all-time favorite memories, partly because at least in my memory the trip was a birthday celebration for the three of us who, if I'm not mistaken, almost share a birthday. I remember that as a very happy day amidst a sea of troubles.

2) The Jewish grandmother quote--I remember as, "sometimes you just wanna go to shul to get away from all the goyim." When Franklin & I first heard it, I believe we were hanging around on the lawn down by the river with a bunch of random queer kids, talking about why we still went to our school's queer club (known as BGLSA--uh huh, yeah, that really rolls of the tongue, doesn't it?) meetings even though they could be dull and/or irritating.

This memory is colored by a wash of carefree happiness that suggests (along with the green grass) that it took place some year either before or after the actual school term.

But whose grandmother was that? Dr. Faustus's? That doesn't seem right, but for some reason all the other queer Harvard boys I can think of (I'm sure it was a boy) are either Catholic or Chinese. Not that that would disqualify them from having a Jewish grandmother, but....

3) Pooh sticks. I have spent many happy hours playing the innocent game of Pooh sticks with various individuals, Amy most prominently among them, but featuring many others from my chequered past in its less chequered moments. And I refuse to have these delightful daydreams shattered by Franklin's insinuations. Really. Hmph.

4) And last but not least, a note about Japan. I've been displacing my stress about every other aspect of this trip onto stress about looking nice (or at least halfway decent), particularly when I first meet up with the assembly, which features in a prominent role someone whose respect I have in the past sought and (I at least believe) never attained, specifically the (Japanese) daughter of the founder of the high school I attended here in Japan. I feel that she always thinks of me as just a big mess who can't take care of herself (this dates back to my time here as a 16-year-old, when she had to call my parents to tell them to get me some new shoes because she had to hide my hole-y shoes when guests visited).

So today I carefully allowed an extra half hour to tidy myself up prior to the meeting. But everyone else was early too, so I showed up with messy hair, sweaty everything, and lunch stains on my shirt.

Ah well. More lessons in letting go of ego and accepting my lack of control over the universe.

Okay, that wasn't last. Last is, Loopy described the current situation well in her post; I am kinda freaked out by this. It wasn't until I visited dear Anushka in SF that it was pointed out to me that by helping these folks out I am supporting their endeavor. I'm not sure how prepared I am to do that. It's not exactly the opposite of socialism, but it's not really compatible, in terms of a worldview...what it is like, in terms of worldview, is the religious cult/group my parents belonged to for years....I just got done deprogramming myself from all this... I feel a bit like an AA twelve-stepper who accidentally signed up to support and accompany a vodka-swilling tour of Russia, or something. No, worse, a vodka-selling tour of rural Montana. Drink vodka, it will solve all your problems. Really.

The parallels start with (but certainly don't end with) the whole "let's all make friends and then there won't be any more war" thing.

Cuz y'know, that worked so well in Iraq (how many times in how many venues did I hear or see Kitty Kelly talking about her humanitarian work with the Wonderful People of Iraq? And did that stop the war? Not that I noticed; you?) (You probably never saw Kitty Kelly and maybe never even heard of her. My point exactly. Ever hear of Ben Granby? Jeremy Scahill? All of them, and hundreds more like them, traveled around the US pleading on behalf of their dear Iraqi friends. The only way to stop war is not "citizen diplomacy" but an end to imperialism, which of course is impossible without an end to capitalism. But don't get me started!)

I mean, international friendships are great, don't get me wrong, and the more kids from Kansas who are forced to travel the world and make international friendships, the better, but.......I'm too tired to explain what I mean right now, although I feel like it's still pretty murky. I'll catch up with y'all later.