deja vu all over again...

...but smaller.

Like everyone else, of course, this reminds me of 9/11, but in terms of proportion, it feels more like a "normal" disaster—the plane crashes & hurricanes that we tut-tut over on a fairly regular basis. My question is, is that a good thing?

Initially I felt some eerie echoes, flashed back to shakily dialing my calling card number into pay phones all day (didn't I have a cell phone then? huh...), going down my list of New Yorkers, starting with those who worked in or next to the towers before calling people who had more likely been safe in Queens. When I couldn't reach people I started calling mutual friends in other states: "Have you heard anything from Suzanne? ...from Effie?...is David okay?..."

The first call I made that morning was to the home of a neighbor with whom I used to ride the subway to work, who worked at the top of the south tower. How do you leave a message for someone, when you don't know if they're giddily relieved or a grieving widow?

"Uh, I hope everything is, you know, okay—I mean, as okay as it could be, under the circumstances—and, uh, if it's, uh, not okay, uh, let us know if there's anything we can do, I mean, I'm not sure what but if there's anything, anyway, we're thinking of you..."

My hands didn't stop shaking for three days.

Of course, by the time we got the message back—

"We just got home from Maine; yours was the first message on the machine. It was so kind of you to call, and now that we're back in touch, do call again and let's catch up...."

—I had known for a while (thanks to the doorman) that her husband was safe, so at this from the wife, I just thought, "Call you back? Why? We hated each other."

Anyway, then is not now. 37 is not 3000, for one thing, and for another, Brits are not Americans. The passers-by on the "telly" seem remarkably unperturbed. Well, back in the day I guess the IRA bombed them all the time—maybe they're used to it.

On our end, this time, only two friends to reach, and the odds were a lot better that they were not hurt. I heard back from one quickly, and she seemed unperturbed ("Yep we're fine!"); the other reports that his friend was in the train ahead of one that was bombed, and that there was "panic this morning but everything seems to have settled down ok." On the BBC there's a "business continuity expert" who said that "we're getting better and better at this."

I watched "The Incredibles" again while walking on the treadmill and was almost surprised that this thing was still on the TV when I finished. Wolf Blitzer was questioning an eyewitness with what seemed (though I hesitate to accuse the esteemed newsman of this) voyeuristic curiosity: "Beyond 'lacerations,' can you describe some of the injuries you saw?" No, really, please don't. Ooh. Ugh. Was that really necessary?



So what does it mean—is this progress, if this seems almost normal, if "business continuity" is getting better and better? Or is it horrific callousness?

Rumsfeld was on after the lacerations, saying we are to "go about our business," because otherwise, you know, we'll be letting the terrorists win. If we accept that this is normal, are we letting the imperialists win?

Is there any choice about it?

What movie am I thinking of, where terrorist incidents are so ordinary that nobody bats an eye—is it "Brazil" or "1984"? Or both?

Sorry, nothing witty today. Hope you & yours are all okay.