check-in #1

Good IM with Nadine this morning. She pointed out (for the gazillionth time, poor thing) that it's not this friend I want... that I need to fill my own needs for myself...

she made me promise that every evening i'll post a blog entry stating whether i did any of the following that day - and if not, what blocked me from it.

Things that make me feel better, build me up: meditation, exercise, photography, other creative activities (collage etc.), reflective journal & blog writing, time with certain of my closest friends (that's you) who remind me of my best self. Taking a bath or other physical self-care can be included but not always. Getting work done.

I need a list of things that break a depressed or obsessive mood. Painting my toenails and playing with the dog come to mind. Going to the movies. I'll have to add to this later.

There are also neutral time-sucks... i.e. they don't hurt in themselves but they take up time I could be spending on the above-mentioned positive activities - mostly, they involve the computer.

So today ... I got some work done early in the morning, but spent most of the rest of the day noodling on the computer. I wish I had exercised. I just had a nice bath but I still wish I had gone for the long walk I planned on when i got up this morning. However, I did a good job of not thinking obsessively about this frush-friend... or thinking he's going to make me happy. On the third hand, I didn't necessarily set good boundaries in my interactions online. So... well... it's overall not a building myself up day but not a total loss... I guess.......