better—thank you!

I'm relieved to report that I feel better. Also slightly sheepish (at right, ha ha) about all the morose musings of the last post, and very grateful for your wonderful outpouring of support.

Time has passed and I've gotten over the whole thing of feeling like I've failed at healing myself. Taking meds is healing myself. I'll get there.

Also, this week, I've taken much better care of myself in Loopy's absence. I've showered, eaten all my meals (sitting down at a table, healthy food, etc.), been mostly on time for things, and went to bed at 2 instead of 4. So I feel better all kinds of ways—including, I feel less crazy observing myself.

Today I spent some pleasant hours with friends. First I spent a couple hours working on a project with an old friend. This is someone I've drifted away from in recent years as we've been fighting more and more, but today, it was unexpectedly wonderful to just spend some time working together in an easy, comfortable manner.

After that, I felt as though going home would be like crawling back under a rock, so on a whim I called up my dear friend Miriam, who was home sick with bronchitis, and asked if I could bring my lunch over to her place. We ended up watching Shaft in Africa (in honor of the ninth anniversary of her mother's death...long story), which I enjoyed even more than I expected.

When I got home, I ate delicious stew followed by delicious apple crisp, both of which Loopy made before she left. I also turned the radio on, which makes a big difference.

Moral of the story: blogging and emailing don't actually make me feel less lonely—in fact they make me feel more lonely and cut-off. Whereas actually spending time with living, breathing people eases all manner of aches and pains. I can't remember the last time I just called up a friend and went over to hang out, without any big plans or anything. Note to self: do that more often.

Thanks again for all your support, everyone... means a lot. Seriously.

Now I'm gonna go have a bath and watch another episode of Firefly. Yay!