changes...

today i'm thinking how, in a way, i'm the same old me, and how, in another way, my old friends would have to get to know me all over again... i feel the same and different... i'm still the same me with the same likes and loves and so on... but i react differently, i hurt less, i smile more, my moods are gentler. i think this is an improvement, but i wonder if i have lost anything that people would miss. would anyone miss the crazy highs? were they fun or just weird? i doubt seriously that anyone would miss the crazy lows!

it doesn't really matter; i'm not changing back for anyone.

i am wondering if i'm exaggerating the change but i really don't think i am. every area of my life is different.

and i'm also afraid to write about it like this for fear i'll somehow jinx it and before i know it i'll be back in the same situation as before. ugh.

need to go to bed now anyway... one day at a time, that's all. just one day at a time.